So posting religiously is a little hard when you're a convert to Toddlerism....yes that's right, Hailey is toddler-ing. I KNOW! I KNOW! Where/how/WHEN did that happen?
Where to even start???! I think last I left off, I was only complaining about Hailey getting teeth! Well, now she has four, count them FOUR FULL teeth... but most importantly, Miss Hailey is now, wait for it.... WALKING. It's the most adorable thing I've ever seen. And although it's more like the Michelin Man waddle, she's pretty quick when she wants to be. I long for the days when I could leave her resting on the floor in her Boppy pillow and fix dinner, or do my hair... or just have a singular train of thought... now it's "Hailey! Get down from the couch!" or "No Hailey! Get out of the fish tank!" WHILE fixing dinner or doing my hair.
She really has grown into her own little person, she now has enough hair for two pigtails, instead of just her little Pebbles hairdo- and funny enough it really makes her look older, not Jon Benet Ramsey pagaent hair older, but she could definitely pass for a strong silent two year old..... and she has grown quite a love for Mommy's mint flavored lipgloss...eating it moreso than wearing it.
But perhaps the best part of Hailey getting closer to one year old is that, Lee is finally finding his place in our little equation. Having a more interactive child has turned Lee into SuperDad and you can just read it all over Hailey's face and to be honest, it's starting to hurt my feelings. I can feel the time is closely upon us where I will slowly take second fiddle and Lee will be the star player. Especially if Hailey keeps up her little daredevil routines, like scaling the gates that keep her off the staircase or climbing the toddler slide at the park with those handy dandy rubber shoe/socks. Dads are always more fun to toddlers and I guess I'll just have to live with it.
So here we are almost a year into parenthood and we're all still standing relatively unscathed..... but we still have to get through the birthday party with the live flame only inches from Her Majesty's grasp... I'll keep you posted... hopefully a little more regularly... knock on wood
Monday, October 18, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Watch out... she's loaded....
Whoever said "there's no use crying over spilled milk," was never a nursing mother.. I've kept it no secret that I plan to breastfeed at least until Hailey's 1st birthday, it was a choice I made way before that awkwardly pressured conversation between you and the Lactation Consultant at the hospital. You know the one... a small elderly woman comes into the room, always wearing small reading glasses and pristine white sneakers... as she assembles your hospital swag bag, she peers over her glasses and asks, "and just how long do you plan to breastfeed?" wait.... I know this one.... um, as long as possible before it gets all Norman Bates-ish? DING DING DING! "Good Answer," she says and hands you your goodies.... what do the women that say " no thanks I like my nipples the way they are, thanks" get? Probably a slap in the face. This lady doesn't look like she plays around.
Anyhoozles... nursing has been the most rewarding, challenging, wonderful, annoying but satisfying experience for me. My little Hailey has become a jubilant bundle of chub, I lost ALL my baby weight ( definitely still have some toning to do but hey....) and the girls look AH-MAZING if I do say so myself... but nursing does take a lot out of you.... Half the time I fall asleep with the baby after I nurse her... and sitting alone in a room with a breastpump for 20 minutes at a time four times a day when I'm away from her isn't as fun as you think it could be.
So the days that I work and I am away from my darling cherub I make sure that there are at least two 5 oz bottles to hold her off until I see her at lunch time, and while I'm away I pump to make enough for the afternoon...etc.... the last words that are ever spoken from myself to Lee when he leaves me are "DON'T FORGET TO PUT THE MILK IN THE FRIDGE!!!" This is usally met with a scoff and "I KNOW!"
Yet.... on more than one occasion.... I have come home to see two completely FULL bottles resting on top of the diaper bag... that have now been sitting out...for hours.... that to me....is the most awful thing to see when I get home.... Hailey could have taken red paint to the carpet.... the dog could have crapped in my shoes..... but no... there it is... my hard work....wasted. And worse I have to now wake up twice in the middle of the night to pump... and my husband cannot understand how I could hold him responsible.... he didn't know.... he was too busy making sure she didn't roll away in the stroller at Bass Pro Shop... What if she got into the catfish tank? Or knocked over the taxidermied antelope.... He had to focus all of his male brain cells on preventing those catastrophies so he can't possibly be expected to remember to put his wife's breastmilk, his daughter's food, his saving grace for a fussy baby, in the fridge.
Anyhoozles... nursing has been the most rewarding, challenging, wonderful, annoying but satisfying experience for me. My little Hailey has become a jubilant bundle of chub, I lost ALL my baby weight ( definitely still have some toning to do but hey....) and the girls look AH-MAZING if I do say so myself... but nursing does take a lot out of you.... Half the time I fall asleep with the baby after I nurse her... and sitting alone in a room with a breastpump for 20 minutes at a time four times a day when I'm away from her isn't as fun as you think it could be.
So the days that I work and I am away from my darling cherub I make sure that there are at least two 5 oz bottles to hold her off until I see her at lunch time, and while I'm away I pump to make enough for the afternoon...etc.... the last words that are ever spoken from myself to Lee when he leaves me are "DON'T FORGET TO PUT THE MILK IN THE FRIDGE!!!" This is usally met with a scoff and "I KNOW!"
Yet.... on more than one occasion.... I have come home to see two completely FULL bottles resting on top of the diaper bag... that have now been sitting out...for hours.... that to me....is the most awful thing to see when I get home.... Hailey could have taken red paint to the carpet.... the dog could have crapped in my shoes..... but no... there it is... my hard work....wasted. And worse I have to now wake up twice in the middle of the night to pump... and my husband cannot understand how I could hold him responsible.... he didn't know.... he was too busy making sure she didn't roll away in the stroller at Bass Pro Shop... What if she got into the catfish tank? Or knocked over the taxidermied antelope.... He had to focus all of his male brain cells on preventing those catastrophies so he can't possibly be expected to remember to put his wife's breastmilk, his daughter's food, his saving grace for a fussy baby, in the fridge.
Don't get me wrong, my husband is an extraordinary father and considering he has absolutely ZERO infant experience, he has been pretty kick-ass at his role as the day care provider... and I wouldn't be myself if I wasn't complaining about SOMETHING. But when it comes to the fruits of my labor I get a little touchy when they are left to spoil in the hot car, or forgotten in the depths of the diaper bag.
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Back from the Land of Nod
It's been quite a while since I have been able to sit down without the spider monkey that is my daughter glued to my hip.
Hailey is 7 months old today- and again.... the swiftness of time passing has left me with my hair blown sideways. Where does it go? Not only that, when did this small helpless being become a wobbly, wiggly mobile machine? EVERYTHING is in her mouth now.... toys, my hair, her FEET...yes her feet.... but most notably there are TEETH in there!!!! Last month I celebrated her half year mark with an ice pack on my left boob after that revelation. SWEET!
But the biggest development for our house is that she is almost mobile. She is pulling and reaching and doing everything if she could just get that little tush in the air she'd be motoring right out the front door. This development is two-fold, it's remarkable to see the progress made right in front of your eyes- like a real life evolutionary diagram playing out in our living room- BUT this means that we have to sprout another pair of eyeballs to stay one step ahead of her. All of a sudden that spare change you leave on the coffee table is now a potential choking hazard for Little Miss Sticky Fingers. And poor Lucy will actually have to go on a feeding schedule so she can't share her food.
Now that we're on a regular schedule, I finally feel ready to put her in her own bed. She is starting to sleep a little heavier now and I'm starting to tire of waking up to a whack in the face every few hours. So tonight is the first night of our second try with a crib. We made one effort before- which only lasted a few hours and at her slightest whimper I swooped in and assumed the cuddle position in less than 45 seconds. But I know if we don't get her in her own room more often, by the time our next baby comes we'll be screwed.
So with the monitor on and both Hailey and Lee asleep in their respective rooms, here I sit. And people let me tell you. I have no clue what to do with myself. I know some people would be screaming "GET SOME SLEEP" or throw out simple suggestions of catching up on things around the house... but I have found myself just pacing the upstairs hallway... bouncing back and forth between the echoing snores of the father and the soft sleepy whines of the baby...
Hailey is 7 months old today- and again.... the swiftness of time passing has left me with my hair blown sideways. Where does it go? Not only that, when did this small helpless being become a wobbly, wiggly mobile machine? EVERYTHING is in her mouth now.... toys, my hair, her FEET...yes her feet.... but most notably there are TEETH in there!!!! Last month I celebrated her half year mark with an ice pack on my left boob after that revelation. SWEET!
But the biggest development for our house is that she is almost mobile. She is pulling and reaching and doing everything if she could just get that little tush in the air she'd be motoring right out the front door. This development is two-fold, it's remarkable to see the progress made right in front of your eyes- like a real life evolutionary diagram playing out in our living room- BUT this means that we have to sprout another pair of eyeballs to stay one step ahead of her. All of a sudden that spare change you leave on the coffee table is now a potential choking hazard for Little Miss Sticky Fingers. And poor Lucy will actually have to go on a feeding schedule so she can't share her food.
Now that we're on a regular schedule, I finally feel ready to put her in her own bed. She is starting to sleep a little heavier now and I'm starting to tire of waking up to a whack in the face every few hours. So tonight is the first night of our second try with a crib. We made one effort before- which only lasted a few hours and at her slightest whimper I swooped in and assumed the cuddle position in less than 45 seconds. But I know if we don't get her in her own room more often, by the time our next baby comes we'll be screwed.
So with the monitor on and both Hailey and Lee asleep in their respective rooms, here I sit. And people let me tell you. I have no clue what to do with myself. I know some people would be screaming "GET SOME SLEEP" or throw out simple suggestions of catching up on things around the house... but I have found myself just pacing the upstairs hallway... bouncing back and forth between the echoing snores of the father and the soft sleepy whines of the baby...
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Finding Our Groove
so it's only been a month since i have time to sit and write.... nothing like following through with commitment... anyways...
so i finally feel that we have somewhat of a schedule... *GASP* only took 5 months to get around to making one of those. so here goes:
up and moving no later than 630AM
breakfast by 830AM
lunch and nap by 1PM
queen of all crankiness by 4PM
dinner 6PM
wind down and asleep by 8PM
and somewhere in between all of those you can guarantee there is a trip to Target. I think Hailey believes we live there. Because there are times when we are out and about through the day while she is napping and she will wake up with a look of great concern as is "wait.... where am I and why am I strapped to this chair?" the only exception being when we are in Target. Honestly, she will open her eyes, and it's like... "red cart..... smell of popcorn.... and that gentle lullaby of the price scanner... RIGHT, TARGET... looks like I'm getting new clothes...wake me up when we get to the car."
I am fortunate enough to have a child who already understands that while in public, we're on our best behavior, at least until freshman year of college and she forms a relationship with Jose Cuervo. It really is wonderful how agreeable she is to coming and going wherever we need to be throughout the day. She is RARELY fussy in front of company, it is my sincere belief that during that time she has a direct conversation with each one of my friends uterus coaxing it to produce a friend for her. She is generally happy to be anywhere but home as it feeds her need to be constantly included in every aspect of mine or Lee's day. But this facade she puts on for company works to my disadvantage as well... because NO ONE will believe me when I say that she kept my up all night, or that she can reach octaves so high that I'm pretty sure my body has started to over produce ear wax as a self defense mechanism.
And maybe she isn't SO bad, but being our first baby, we have nothing to compare her to. So here me out world, unless you come and sit in my living room between 4-6 PM every night to witness it yourself, TAKE MY WORD FOR IT. H-A-I-L-E-Y spells FUSSY.
"Is she generally a happy baby?"
"Yes, but she has her moments..."
"Oh, I can't believe that, look she's smiling at me."
"She's not smiling at you, she's talking to your uterus, gathering her minions for world domination."
so i finally feel that we have somewhat of a schedule... *GASP* only took 5 months to get around to making one of those. so here goes:
up and moving no later than 630AM
breakfast by 830AM
lunch and nap by 1PM
queen of all crankiness by 4PM
dinner 6PM
wind down and asleep by 8PM
and somewhere in between all of those you can guarantee there is a trip to Target. I think Hailey believes we live there. Because there are times when we are out and about through the day while she is napping and she will wake up with a look of great concern as is "wait.... where am I and why am I strapped to this chair?" the only exception being when we are in Target. Honestly, she will open her eyes, and it's like... "red cart..... smell of popcorn.... and that gentle lullaby of the price scanner... RIGHT, TARGET... looks like I'm getting new clothes...wake me up when we get to the car."
I am fortunate enough to have a child who already understands that while in public, we're on our best behavior, at least until freshman year of college and she forms a relationship with Jose Cuervo. It really is wonderful how agreeable she is to coming and going wherever we need to be throughout the day. She is RARELY fussy in front of company, it is my sincere belief that during that time she has a direct conversation with each one of my friends uterus coaxing it to produce a friend for her. She is generally happy to be anywhere but home as it feeds her need to be constantly included in every aspect of mine or Lee's day. But this facade she puts on for company works to my disadvantage as well... because NO ONE will believe me when I say that she kept my up all night, or that she can reach octaves so high that I'm pretty sure my body has started to over produce ear wax as a self defense mechanism.
And maybe she isn't SO bad, but being our first baby, we have nothing to compare her to. So here me out world, unless you come and sit in my living room between 4-6 PM every night to witness it yourself, TAKE MY WORD FOR IT. H-A-I-L-E-Y spells FUSSY.
"Is she generally a happy baby?"
"Yes, but she has her moments..."
"Oh, I can't believe that, look she's smiling at me."
"She's not smiling at you, she's talking to your uterus, gathering her minions for world domination."
Friday, March 19, 2010
So It Begins...
Hailey had her 4 month check up a few weeks ago, and we got the OK to start cereal and stage 1 jar foods. Oh my gosh we were so excited, we actually waited outside Babies R Us until it opened just to run in and get cereal ( I am aware you can get it anywhere, but we bought her a jumperoo too... and there's just something about getting everything from the baby store... makes it seem more official...?)
Anyways.... the first experience was unsuccessful. She had no idea what to make of the whole spoon situation and could not figure out what I was attempting to drape her with this huge bib. After a few tries, we just started putting it in her bottle, and she GOBBLED it up...and she SLEPT and SLEPT and SLEPT all night. Not even fidgeting or anything.... you know like that good Thanksgiving day nap that is just AMAZING? Like that.
Then we started sweet potatoes and carrots... not a huge success either, but I've been told it takes a few tries to see what they'll eat on a regular basis. But Lee let her suck on part of an apple, and she loved it. She now whines at anyone eating an apple in a 30 ft radius. Part of me wanted to throw a shoe at him for giving her fruit- doesn't he know that our child will never eat vegetables now!! That's all everyone ever told us, don't give them fruits...they'll never eat the veggies... but the majorityof me was so excited to see her love something so much... especially something nutritious.
I have this fantasy that she will love all fruits and veggies and be just the most gorgeous creature... and she'll just be perfect and never go through that awkward pudgy phase of 5th grade because all she ate was peanut butter chocolate chip sandwiches ( I'm only speculating here... I swear). I digress... I don't think I'll get that lucky... especially when my husband is begging me to make him a milkshake at 1030PM... and him being her primary care giver during the day... my hopes aren't too high for her to want carrots over french fries.
Regardless... she is now even more adorable covered in orange mush... and the reality that I don't stand a chance against her adorableness is becoming more apparent everyday....
Anyways.... the first experience was unsuccessful. She had no idea what to make of the whole spoon situation and could not figure out what I was attempting to drape her with this huge bib. After a few tries, we just started putting it in her bottle, and she GOBBLED it up...and she SLEPT and SLEPT and SLEPT all night. Not even fidgeting or anything.... you know like that good Thanksgiving day nap that is just AMAZING? Like that.
Then we started sweet potatoes and carrots... not a huge success either, but I've been told it takes a few tries to see what they'll eat on a regular basis. But Lee let her suck on part of an apple, and she loved it. She now whines at anyone eating an apple in a 30 ft radius. Part of me wanted to throw a shoe at him for giving her fruit- doesn't he know that our child will never eat vegetables now!! That's all everyone ever told us, don't give them fruits...they'll never eat the veggies... but the majorityof me was so excited to see her love something so much... especially something nutritious.
I have this fantasy that she will love all fruits and veggies and be just the most gorgeous creature... and she'll just be perfect and never go through that awkward pudgy phase of 5th grade because all she ate was peanut butter chocolate chip sandwiches ( I'm only speculating here... I swear). I digress... I don't think I'll get that lucky... especially when my husband is begging me to make him a milkshake at 1030PM... and him being her primary care giver during the day... my hopes aren't too high for her to want carrots over french fries.
Regardless... she is now even more adorable covered in orange mush... and the reality that I don't stand a chance against her adorableness is becoming more apparent everyday....
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Bring It....*GROAN*
Since Hailey was born, and we had those late nights and even earlier mornings...to say we saw a lot of infomercials is an understatement. I actually had my favorites, I wouldn't let Lee change the channel because I HAD to watch Sue make 9 different dinners using the Easy Xpress 101...( and Snicker's Surprise Cake too? GET OUT! It can't be done! Oh yes it can!)
Anyways, the past four months I have also seen infomercials for a little program called P90X. And.... I BOUGHT IT.
This is how they get you... they have every possible scenario play out on the screen... the guy who has diabetes who had to change his lifestyle or DIE... the ex-Marine who got a little to comfortable when he got married...and finally... the new mom who just didn't have time to go too the gym....DING DING DING! WE HAVE WINNER!!!!
Anyways, the past four months I have also seen infomercials for a little program called P90X. And.... I BOUGHT IT.
This is how they get you... they have every possible scenario play out on the screen... the guy who has diabetes who had to change his lifestyle or DIE... the ex-Marine who got a little to comfortable when he got married...and finally... the new mom who just didn't have time to go too the gym....DING DING DING! WE HAVE WINNER!!!!
Well, we tried it and it's HARD. It's the simplest moves and nothing terribly difficult... but when you're muscles are sitting under a layer of jelly like mine... it gets the flubber jiggling. And it's all about the repetition... holy lord... 400 core moves in 15 minutes.... PHEW! I'm sweating just writing about it. I have high ambitions to do it everyday, but I know that is not going to happen. But now I have a tool to help me when I DO get the time. I'll tell you one thing though, if..and I mean IF we do decide to have another baby, hopefully I won't have to sit on my ass for the first trimester again so I can keep my hopefully newly trimmed figure..
notice all the hopefullys...
Saturday, February 20, 2010
All Aboard!
So the wonderful part of Hailey getting older is her sleeping through most of the night....there are other wonderful things but this...this is the wonderfulest. If she sleeps, I get to sleep and that equals non-microwaved dinners and clean underwear for everyone! Wahoo!
But here I will make an admission that has been getting mixed reviews...
I let Hailey sleep in bed with me....
Now hear me out. I am still nursing and it is soooooo nice to just roll over and nurse her when she starts to fuss. Thus I avoid the piercing howl of a screaming, empty-bellied baby and don't have to drag my sleepy butt down the hall. I have been trying to get her to sleep in the pack & play next to our bed off and on since she's been born, and we usually can get her to stay there for a good 4 hours at a time, but usually around 1AM she is fussy, and I'll be damned if I'm going to sit up with her and lose out on my sleep when I can just as easily tuck her in next to me and hop back on the Dreamland Express. I know, I know... " she'll never learn to be independent.." I don't plan on letting her sleep with us until she's 14, just until she starts having uninterrupted sleep more regularly.
But I will admit the hardest part isn't for her, it's for me. The times when she does sleep in her bed, it's almost a lonely feeling. Yes, I am still comforted with a 200lb man and a 15lb dog (yes, i know... it IS crowded....but mind your business) but something about not having her tiny hand resting across my bosom (yes... BOSOM) leaves me a little empty sometimes. I know I should be rejoicing, and sprawling across the mattress and breaking out the down comforters- and my sleep if more restful sans baby- but after 9 months of always having someone with you, it's hard to kick the habit. You know how some people have conditioned themselves to fall asleep to white noise, or the tv.... well mine is the soft purr of a congested nose followed by an ever softer sigh of one little girl surrendering to the Sand Man.
And if i have to buy her one of these when she's older...so be it...
But here I will make an admission that has been getting mixed reviews...
I let Hailey sleep in bed with me....
Now hear me out. I am still nursing and it is soooooo nice to just roll over and nurse her when she starts to fuss. Thus I avoid the piercing howl of a screaming, empty-bellied baby and don't have to drag my sleepy butt down the hall. I have been trying to get her to sleep in the pack & play next to our bed off and on since she's been born, and we usually can get her to stay there for a good 4 hours at a time, but usually around 1AM she is fussy, and I'll be damned if I'm going to sit up with her and lose out on my sleep when I can just as easily tuck her in next to me and hop back on the Dreamland Express. I know, I know... " she'll never learn to be independent.." I don't plan on letting her sleep with us until she's 14, just until she starts having uninterrupted sleep more regularly.
But I will admit the hardest part isn't for her, it's for me. The times when she does sleep in her bed, it's almost a lonely feeling. Yes, I am still comforted with a 200lb man and a 15lb dog (yes, i know... it IS crowded....but mind your business) but something about not having her tiny hand resting across my bosom (yes... BOSOM) leaves me a little empty sometimes. I know I should be rejoicing, and sprawling across the mattress and breaking out the down comforters- and my sleep if more restful sans baby- but after 9 months of always having someone with you, it's hard to kick the habit. You know how some people have conditioned themselves to fall asleep to white noise, or the tv.... well mine is the soft purr of a congested nose followed by an ever softer sigh of one little girl surrendering to the Sand Man.
And if i have to buy her one of these when she's older...so be it...
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Efficiency
One thing I have come to realize as a new mom is that time is.... I want to say time is money, but that's not right.... time is... PRECIOUS. It's amazing how quickly you can clean your home, cook dinner, grocery shop....etc.... when you know you only have a two hour napping window to work with. My personal best so far has been: unload groceries, start dinner, organize pantry, started laundry and unloaded dishwasher. Ok... dinner was from the crock pot and all that was in the dishwasher was Tupperware BUT STILL.... it counts.
However, the one thing I have failed to realize is that the entire world does not know I have a 4 month old. If she is not with me, no one holds the door or lets me cut in line at Target.... which... no one has to do anyways.... but it's been very nice to know that there are people in the world who understand the value of a quiet shopping experience with a baby. At the same time, it makes me have terrible thoughts about the people WHO DO NOT CARE....regardless of the fact that they are one of the few people in the universe my family has not memo'd that I have birthed a small human who very well could be the future cover model for People's Most Beautiful People Issue.
I now have very little patience for people who are inefficient with their time..which in turn makes them HUGE wasters of my time. And what's worse is that I became a mother when snotty 16 year old jerks took over the work force. I now have to wait for over pierced, sulking Janie to finish her text messaging before I can politely tell her she gave me the wrong amount of change back. Waiters, grocery clerks, post office employees beware. If I come into your place of employment BE PREPARED TO DO YOUR JOB! LIKE.... NOW! I think I will just make myself a shirt that says " I have a small child waiting on me at home with an inexperienced husband and if you do not hand over my KFC snacker in the next 13 seconds I will shoot milk at you and squish your face in the drive thru window. " (nice ring to it, don't you think?)
But I digress.... Time is Precious.... so much more valuable than you ever thought. Not only is my day completely controlled by Hailey's digestive system, I'm afraid if I take my eyes off her I'll miss out on something completely necessary to my mommy mental scrapbook..which does make it hard to drive sometimes. I must tell her six times a day "I will remember you JUST like this forever..." 16 weeks have somehow slipped through my fingers and now I have a 4 month old in 6 month clothes and size 2 diapers....*sigh*
However, the one thing I have failed to realize is that the entire world does not know I have a 4 month old. If she is not with me, no one holds the door or lets me cut in line at Target.... which... no one has to do anyways.... but it's been very nice to know that there are people in the world who understand the value of a quiet shopping experience with a baby. At the same time, it makes me have terrible thoughts about the people WHO DO NOT CARE....regardless of the fact that they are one of the few people in the universe my family has not memo'd that I have birthed a small human who very well could be the future cover model for People's Most Beautiful People Issue.
I now have very little patience for people who are inefficient with their time..which in turn makes them HUGE wasters of my time. And what's worse is that I became a mother when snotty 16 year old jerks took over the work force. I now have to wait for over pierced, sulking Janie to finish her text messaging before I can politely tell her she gave me the wrong amount of change back. Waiters, grocery clerks, post office employees beware. If I come into your place of employment BE PREPARED TO DO YOUR JOB! LIKE.... NOW! I think I will just make myself a shirt that says " I have a small child waiting on me at home with an inexperienced husband and if you do not hand over my KFC snacker in the next 13 seconds I will shoot milk at you and squish your face in the drive thru window. " (nice ring to it, don't you think?)
But I digress.... Time is Precious.... so much more valuable than you ever thought. Not only is my day completely controlled by Hailey's digestive system, I'm afraid if I take my eyes off her I'll miss out on something completely necessary to my mommy mental scrapbook..which does make it hard to drive sometimes. I must tell her six times a day "I will remember you JUST like this forever..." 16 weeks have somehow slipped through my fingers and now I have a 4 month old in 6 month clothes and size 2 diapers....*sigh*
Saturday, January 30, 2010
A Lovey
Everyone keeps asking me if Hailey has a "lovey," or a favorite toy, yet. And I'm thinking she's too young to really be attached to something, since she can't even hold on to anything but my finger or my hair... the latter being a new development that has only prompted me to ALWAYS have a ponytail holder near by.
Anyways, we were given a number of potential loveys that are just adorable, and would be even more adorable being toted around, getting filthy and ending up with only one eyeball....*sigh*..... but I get the feeling that Hailey's lovey will end up being something completely bizarre...
You see, we have started Hailey on the Baby Einstein movies. And in Baby Mozart, there are a variety of images, colors and animals displayed with classical music playing along with them. There are elephant puppets and lights... there is a shiny top that spins around.... but the ONLY thing that gets Hailey's feet kicking and her eyes wide is three different color gels pouring from the top of the screen to the bottom of the screen. And I flash forward three or four years and see the two of us in the shampoo aisle in Target, with her throwing a fit because she can't have a bottle of Head & Shoulders.
Whatever it is, I've been told to be smart and whatever it is she falls in love with, to buy in bulk in case of it gets lost, chewed or left behind on an airplane. In the meantime, I will continue to shove the array of stuffed animals in her face, in hopes one will stick.
Anyways, we were given a number of potential loveys that are just adorable, and would be even more adorable being toted around, getting filthy and ending up with only one eyeball....*sigh*..... but I get the feeling that Hailey's lovey will end up being something completely bizarre...
You see, we have started Hailey on the Baby Einstein movies. And in Baby Mozart, there are a variety of images, colors and animals displayed with classical music playing along with them. There are elephant puppets and lights... there is a shiny top that spins around.... but the ONLY thing that gets Hailey's feet kicking and her eyes wide is three different color gels pouring from the top of the screen to the bottom of the screen. And I flash forward three or four years and see the two of us in the shampoo aisle in Target, with her throwing a fit because she can't have a bottle of Head & Shoulders.
Whatever it is, I've been told to be smart and whatever it is she falls in love with, to buy in bulk in case of it gets lost, chewed or left behind on an airplane. In the meantime, I will continue to shove the array of stuffed animals in her face, in hopes one will stick.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
The Flood
So Hailey is three months old today. Holy wow.... and she's getting SO big.... I just LOVE it.
A family friend saw her recently and said "Oh! look at her! I could just suck her face!" and you really just could.... you just want to pinch her cheeks and blow raspberries on her belly....
She is becoming so alert and very much aware of her hands (always in her mouth) but most of all she is becoming VERY vocal. She coos and hoos at everything and you just want to cry it makes you so happy to hear these small noises coming out of this adorable little rosebud mouth.
I've come to think of her chubbiness as quite the achievement. The human body is just an amazing piece of work. It's amazing how something so small grows so large so fast! It's also amazing how every three hours like clockwork I go from a C to DD and if I'm not quick I usually need a shirt change by 1130am. I might just bring tie-dye back so I could have a little camouflage. Some mom's have those little rubber bracelets to keep track of their child's feeding, my reminder's built in. And as uncomfortable as it can be sometimes, I have really come to love nursing. This sounds weird I know, and Lee is completely baffled by that sentiment, but I have been thinking about the future when she spends more time away from me during the week while I am at work, and it makes me a little melancholy.
Thinking of how I won't get to cradle her when she needs me, and how I will be spending my breaks with a pump and not her. Not being able to watch her fight those heavy eyelids as they close and drift her off to whatever babies dream of.... clouds and puppies I'm sure...
I never would have imagined this world of emotion that came to be once Hailey entered the atmosphere. As tired as I get and as often as I desperately wish for just one full night of uninterrupted sleep, I still feel lonely if she's not by my side. I love her clammy lint collecting toes and her perfectly centered nose.... I want to put on a cape and fly her to the moon when she lets out that heartbreaking whimper in the middle of the night.... but most of all I want to wrap her in bubble paper and keep her from all the bad things in the world.... be it a bumblebee or an open manhole.... I want her to stay the perfectly sweet bundle of chub that she is...
that's not too much to ask is it?
A family friend saw her recently and said "Oh! look at her! I could just suck her face!" and you really just could.... you just want to pinch her cheeks and blow raspberries on her belly....
She is becoming so alert and very much aware of her hands (always in her mouth) but most of all she is becoming VERY vocal. She coos and hoos at everything and you just want to cry it makes you so happy to hear these small noises coming out of this adorable little rosebud mouth.
I've come to think of her chubbiness as quite the achievement. The human body is just an amazing piece of work. It's amazing how something so small grows so large so fast! It's also amazing how every three hours like clockwork I go from a C to DD and if I'm not quick I usually need a shirt change by 1130am. I might just bring tie-dye back so I could have a little camouflage. Some mom's have those little rubber bracelets to keep track of their child's feeding, my reminder's built in. And as uncomfortable as it can be sometimes, I have really come to love nursing. This sounds weird I know, and Lee is completely baffled by that sentiment, but I have been thinking about the future when she spends more time away from me during the week while I am at work, and it makes me a little melancholy.
Thinking of how I won't get to cradle her when she needs me, and how I will be spending my breaks with a pump and not her. Not being able to watch her fight those heavy eyelids as they close and drift her off to whatever babies dream of.... clouds and puppies I'm sure...
I never would have imagined this world of emotion that came to be once Hailey entered the atmosphere. As tired as I get and as often as I desperately wish for just one full night of uninterrupted sleep, I still feel lonely if she's not by my side. I love her clammy lint collecting toes and her perfectly centered nose.... I want to put on a cape and fly her to the moon when she lets out that heartbreaking whimper in the middle of the night.... but most of all I want to wrap her in bubble paper and keep her from all the bad things in the world.... be it a bumblebee or an open manhole.... I want her to stay the perfectly sweet bundle of chub that she is...
that's not too much to ask is it?
Friday, January 22, 2010
A Little Green
So Lucy has been REALLY wonderful with Hailey. Really.
The first few weeks, I think she was just being polite, but then when she realized no one was coming to pick up this hairless new pet- she accepted her new sister and gave up her spot on the bed with only a slight hint resentment.
We've tried really hard to make the transition not so terrible for her. Before Hailey even arrived I let her smell the diapers and clothes... she even ended up getting one of Hailey's toys as her own... I let her spend a lot of time with my nephew when he was in town, trying to adjust her to small hands that often carry snacks... Lee was really good about taking her to the park when he was home with me on FMLA... he even let her catch a pigeon (gross), which usually we let her get just close enough and then we shoo the birds away. Regardless... it still hurts my heart just a little when I see her resign to the couch and heave a heavy sigh because she's not the only child anymore. I guess it just goes to show that even if you give the same amount of attention things will just never be the same for them.
However, Lucy does love Hailey and I know this because every day I walk in the door from work with Hailey, Lucy goes...BONKERS. She jumps and whines until I put the carrier down for her to smell the baby to make sure she came back with all the same parts she left with. A-DORABLE. That makes my heart happy. Whenever I'm nursing Hailey, Lucy always HAS to sit right next to me to make sure no one gets too close...Werlinger girls are very particular about not sharing food... but the biggest change I've noticed is this.... Lucy never ran out the door to meet/bark at people. She would never go past the threshold nor would she stick around if anyone new entered the house, she'd always go hide upstairs. But since the baby has arrived her bark is more ferocious than ever toward strangers (well as ferocious as a 14lb dog could be)... she also bolts out the walkway to see who's coming and if she approves.
Overall, we love that she loves her and we hope that we can teach Hailey to love her GENTLY so she keeps loving her.
The first few weeks, I think she was just being polite, but then when she realized no one was coming to pick up this hairless new pet- she accepted her new sister and gave up her spot on the bed with only a slight hint resentment.
We've tried really hard to make the transition not so terrible for her. Before Hailey even arrived I let her smell the diapers and clothes... she even ended up getting one of Hailey's toys as her own... I let her spend a lot of time with my nephew when he was in town, trying to adjust her to small hands that often carry snacks... Lee was really good about taking her to the park when he was home with me on FMLA... he even let her catch a pigeon (gross), which usually we let her get just close enough and then we shoo the birds away. Regardless... it still hurts my heart just a little when I see her resign to the couch and heave a heavy sigh because she's not the only child anymore. I guess it just goes to show that even if you give the same amount of attention things will just never be the same for them.
However, Lucy does love Hailey and I know this because every day I walk in the door from work with Hailey, Lucy goes...BONKERS. She jumps and whines until I put the carrier down for her to smell the baby to make sure she came back with all the same parts she left with. A-DORABLE. That makes my heart happy. Whenever I'm nursing Hailey, Lucy always HAS to sit right next to me to make sure no one gets too close...Werlinger girls are very particular about not sharing food... but the biggest change I've noticed is this.... Lucy never ran out the door to meet/bark at people. She would never go past the threshold nor would she stick around if anyone new entered the house, she'd always go hide upstairs. But since the baby has arrived her bark is more ferocious than ever toward strangers (well as ferocious as a 14lb dog could be)... she also bolts out the walkway to see who's coming and if she approves.
Overall, we love that she loves her and we hope that we can teach Hailey to love her GENTLY so she keeps loving her.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Rainy Days
The past few days, Las Vegas has probably had the most consecutive days of rain I have ever seen in the 8 years I've lived here. And it's days like this you just want to cuddle up with a comfy blanket and a good movie and not go anywhere.... but something had also been brought to my attention.... before I had Hailey, I didn't think twice about how I drove or running out the store for milk or peanut butter (you know how fast I go through it)... I could have gone to the gym anytime I wanted ( not that I did...but I could have)...but that's all changed.
Now I can't go to the store after work because I have Hailey... and I'll be damned if I'm gonna cart her around through the rain and have her get the sniffles....although I'm sure they'd be the most adorable sniffles on the planet...
I also never really thought twice about driving in the rain or late at night. I admit I wasn't the slowest driver out there... and with my iPod going I may have been distracted and ran a red light every now and then...
But again, NOW I'm checking my blind spot two...three times. I drive 5 miles under the speed limit and with the kind of rain we've been having lately, I'd almost sleep at work if I could. And now that I still have at least 20lbs to lose, and ACTUALLY want to go the gym, I have to make sure Lee can manage her long enough for me to work up a sweat.
Now mind you NONE of this is complaining. It's all just observations of my life now. I think it's funny that there are life's little reminders to slow down and enjoy yourself, your friends, your family but at the same time life is just FLYING by.
I cannot believe that I have a 12 week old daughter already. Where did the time go? Aren't I still PREGNANT? Did I really go through LABOR? It seems like just yesterday I was so excited to buy maternity clothes (say what!?!? yes actually excited to have a 6in elastic band around my tummy).... I guess when you get lost just staring at this person just sprouting up before your eyes you forget to look at the clock.
Now I can't go to the store after work because I have Hailey... and I'll be damned if I'm gonna cart her around through the rain and have her get the sniffles....although I'm sure they'd be the most adorable sniffles on the planet...
I also never really thought twice about driving in the rain or late at night. I admit I wasn't the slowest driver out there... and with my iPod going I may have been distracted and ran a red light every now and then...
But again, NOW I'm checking my blind spot two...three times. I drive 5 miles under the speed limit and with the kind of rain we've been having lately, I'd almost sleep at work if I could. And now that I still have at least 20lbs to lose, and ACTUALLY want to go the gym, I have to make sure Lee can manage her long enough for me to work up a sweat.
Now mind you NONE of this is complaining. It's all just observations of my life now. I think it's funny that there are life's little reminders to slow down and enjoy yourself, your friends, your family but at the same time life is just FLYING by.
I cannot believe that I have a 12 week old daughter already. Where did the time go? Aren't I still PREGNANT? Did I really go through LABOR? It seems like just yesterday I was so excited to buy maternity clothes (say what!?!? yes actually excited to have a 6in elastic band around my tummy).... I guess when you get lost just staring at this person just sprouting up before your eyes you forget to look at the clock.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
hi ho, hi ho...
So I've returned to work after 9 glorious weeks of SAHM status....and gosh I wish I didn't have to.... can't someone just pay me to stay home and stare at my little girl? That'd be great....but alas... there's a mortgage to pay....so here I am back at work with Hailey at my side. My boss was gracious enough to let me bring her to work until she requires too much attention... (thanks Papa Joe :) ) It's hard though. I need to focus on work and patients, but all I (and everyone else in the office) want to do is stare at every little movement....every facial expression... *sigh*
A few days, Lee has taken her for part of the day so I can actually get SOMETHING done at the office, and when he does.... I MISS HER SO MUCH... is that terrible? It's only for a matter of 3 or 4 hours, but I worry. (I can hear my mother doing the "I told you so" song) Yes, she's with her dad, not with a 19 year old nanny that seems to be ever present in Las Vegas... he loves her and would fight to the ends of the earth for her happiness...but it's different I guess.
When she's with me, she doesn't get bottles, she gets the good stuff, 98.5 degrees just the way she likes it... she doesn't have to settle for cold milk or that stupid bottle....it's just not the same. I know that she won't cry for very long because I can give her the comforting that she needs by just breastfeeding.... which I have mentioned is the best part of nursing... FAR LESS fussy time...
I guess that is really the only REAL difference between being with mom and being with dad... boob vs. bottle... but at the same time it's not... does this make any sense?
Being the mom, or a woman in general, I anticipate her needs and prepare for them, while men just "wait and see." I guess it's the fundamental difference between men and women in every aspect of life, but now that there is a physical being affected by Mars vs. Venus, it's sooooo much more obvious to me....
Being away from her during the day for those few short hours just makes my heart swell with love (my chest too...but that's another post all together) when Lee walks in the door with her. I want to smother her with kisses as if she has been on a deserted island for weeks...God help me when she goes to kindergarten...let alone college- oh GOD I DON'T EVEN WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT!!! When I see her and she gives me that gummy little smile I just want to melt like a snowball in Phoenix....wouldn't you?
Monday, January 18, 2010
Look Out Walter
Alright world.... since my overwhelming desire to become a MRS. expedited my college experience to a mere 3 years instead of 4, I never got that "maybe I'll change my major 16 times" period. No, I had a life to get started (and how...) I had the man, I had the ring and dammit I was sprinting down that aisle and the ink was not even dry on the diploma.
My brother-in-law is now in his 6th year in college, and still hasn't the slightest as to what he will be slaving away at for the next 25 years. He has had all this time to figure it out on his parents' dime and still continues to ponder. Now, not that I for a minute believe that ANYONE knows EXACTLY what they want to do for the rest of their lives, and even those 2 people that do know rarely get to actually DO it. But wouldn't it be fabulous if you just could do anything... no school, no resumes, no "tell me your weaknesses" interview (total trick question by the way)....you just got to wake up one morning and say "I think I'll be a zookeeper today.." you know... just how Elmo does it.
I have NEVER had a strong desire to be anything but a MRS. and a MOM (check...check..) so now what? I'm glad you asked.... World, I am going to write a book! Say what? You heard me.... I am going to start writing books and I'm starting with Hailey.
I am giving myself 2 years to have an actual children's book published...which gives me plenty of time to land on Oprah before she "retires" since my whole "going into labor at the rodeo" didn't play out for me. I have always loved the idea of putting my randomness and creativity to use. So why not pour myself into something that will benefit not only my own child but (hopefully) dozens if not millions of other bright little stars out there...
so here goes nothing.....and mark my words... 2012 isn't just for Armageddon anymore... it's the year MRS.MOMMY gets published.
My brother-in-law is now in his 6th year in college, and still hasn't the slightest as to what he will be slaving away at for the next 25 years. He has had all this time to figure it out on his parents' dime and still continues to ponder. Now, not that I for a minute believe that ANYONE knows EXACTLY what they want to do for the rest of their lives, and even those 2 people that do know rarely get to actually DO it. But wouldn't it be fabulous if you just could do anything... no school, no resumes, no "tell me your weaknesses" interview (total trick question by the way)....you just got to wake up one morning and say "I think I'll be a zookeeper today.." you know... just how Elmo does it.
I have NEVER had a strong desire to be anything but a MRS. and a MOM (check...check..) so now what? I'm glad you asked.... World, I am going to write a book! Say what? You heard me.... I am going to start writing books and I'm starting with Hailey.
I am giving myself 2 years to have an actual children's book published...which gives me plenty of time to land on Oprah before she "retires" since my whole "going into labor at the rodeo" didn't play out for me. I have always loved the idea of putting my randomness and creativity to use. So why not pour myself into something that will benefit not only my own child but (hopefully) dozens if not millions of other bright little stars out there...
so here goes nothing.....and mark my words... 2012 isn't just for Armageddon anymore... it's the year MRS.MOMMY gets published.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Baby Knows Best
OK... so I had a little scuffle with the doctor's office this past week... I've made it quite clear that I exclusively breastfeed Hailey. A choice that I am quite proud of myself for sticking to (not that there is anything wrong with those who choose not to, it is very difficult and sometimes a complete pain in the ass and I can totally understand those who go the formula route) and I plan to continue breastfeeding until Hailey can take whole milk...at the very least until she starts solids.
A few weeks ago, I noticed my supply was extremely low. I went from pumping 4-5oz bottles to barely pumping a half ounce. This concerned me, and on top of that Hailey hadn't pooped in 2 days***. I ramped up my H2O intake..maybe I was dehydrated? I made sure to take my vitamin.... but still I seemed to be lacking.
Being a first time mother (see also: nervous wreck over analyzer) I scoured through The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding and What to Expect the First Year (the bibles of motherhood) and all of them said that as long as baby is excreting regularly, she was getting enough milk***.... um.... ok not happening... then I also read that should you start a hormonal birth control your milk supply can decrease.... at my postpartum appointment, my doctor had started me on a pill- so I called and asked what kind of pill they had prescribed to me...I had made a point to tell them I was exclusively breastfeeding at the appointment so surely they would have taken that into account...right?..WRONG! They'd given me a pill containing estrogen and 2 weeks after taking it they inform me that it will decrease your milk supply. Long story short- pediatrician said Hailey was just fine and obviously getting the nutrition she needs because at 9 weeks she is almost 12lbs- and my doctor put me on a medication to increase milk supply which now I could pretty much go toe- to- toe with any soda fountain.
ANYWAY... the whole point of this post is that during this whole ordeal... Hailey was FINE... like she knew the whole time everything would work out. One night, terrified that my poor helpless child was starving I prepared a formula bottle and offered it to her. She would NOT take it. She just pushed it away... as if to say " Hey Mom, umm your boob is much more delicious than this tofu-milk that you're trying to give me.... keep trying, YOU CAN DO IT! Don't give it up! If I could clap my hands I'd show you how much I believe in you!! But I can't so i'll just fart!"
And I didn't give up. And now I wish she was only pooping every 2 days because she too could go toe-to-toe with any soda fountain (GROSS...sorry).
*** The Pediatrician said some breastfed babies can go 10 days without pooping, but they are still well nourished. (but man I would be craaaaaaaaannnnkkyy)
*** The books also did say that after an adjustment period your boobs will feel "empty" but they are still very much so in production...
A few weeks ago, I noticed my supply was extremely low. I went from pumping 4-5oz bottles to barely pumping a half ounce. This concerned me, and on top of that Hailey hadn't pooped in 2 days***. I ramped up my H2O intake..maybe I was dehydrated? I made sure to take my vitamin.... but still I seemed to be lacking.
Being a first time mother (see also: nervous wreck over analyzer) I scoured through The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding and What to Expect the First Year (the bibles of motherhood) and all of them said that as long as baby is excreting regularly, she was getting enough milk***.... um.... ok not happening... then I also read that should you start a hormonal birth control your milk supply can decrease.... at my postpartum appointment, my doctor had started me on a pill- so I called and asked what kind of pill they had prescribed to me...I had made a point to tell them I was exclusively breastfeeding at the appointment so surely they would have taken that into account...right?..WRONG! They'd given me a pill containing estrogen and 2 weeks after taking it they inform me that it will decrease your milk supply. Long story short- pediatrician said Hailey was just fine and obviously getting the nutrition she needs because at 9 weeks she is almost 12lbs- and my doctor put me on a medication to increase milk supply which now I could pretty much go toe- to- toe with any soda fountain.
ANYWAY... the whole point of this post is that during this whole ordeal... Hailey was FINE... like she knew the whole time everything would work out. One night, terrified that my poor helpless child was starving I prepared a formula bottle and offered it to her. She would NOT take it. She just pushed it away... as if to say " Hey Mom, umm your boob is much more delicious than this tofu-milk that you're trying to give me.... keep trying, YOU CAN DO IT! Don't give it up! If I could clap my hands I'd show you how much I believe in you!! But I can't so i'll just fart!"
And I didn't give up. And now I wish she was only pooping every 2 days because she too could go toe-to-toe with any soda fountain (GROSS...sorry).
*** The Pediatrician said some breastfed babies can go 10 days without pooping, but they are still well nourished. (but man I would be craaaaaaaaannnnkkyy)
*** The books also did say that after an adjustment period your boobs will feel "empty" but they are still very much so in production...
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
I Heart Meryl
Dear Meryl Streep,
You are wonderful. I adore you. Please adopt me. Or leave the outgoing message on my cell phone.
-Caitlin
So in the past few years I think I have seen almost EVERY movie Meryl Streep has been in. Evening...Rendition... Devil Wears Prada... Doubt...It's Complicated... not to mention the delicious Julie & Julia... And she is JUST fabulous. And while watching the Today Show a few weeks ago... I heard that with this year's Golden Globes nominations, she will have been nominated 25 times. 25! Holy wow.
Well, my sister and I decided that since we have seen all of her recent work, we should start working our way through her film catalog. So last Saturday marked the first meeting of our mini Meryl Streep fan club, our viewing included "The Deer Hunter" and "Kramer vs. Kramer."
The AFI lists "The Deer Hunter" as one of the top 100 films. With all due respect to Mrs. Streep, I think it could have been skipped. 3 hours and 4 minutes of utter misery in the lives of three friends, without even a remotely positive ending. But maybe we expected our leading lady to play a larger role and since she didn't, that added to the disappointment.
"Kramer vs. Kramer" however... wonderfully emotional and even though the emphasis falls on Dustin Hoffman's character, I think it was a wonderful addition to Meryl Streep repertoire
Since our first meeting fizzled, for the next movie we decided we needed a bigger fix, so we aimed for one of her better known films.... "Out of Africa...." Robert Redford, delicious.... photography...brilliantly beautiful... Meryl... oh Meryl I love you American, I love you Danish... your larynx is a veritable United Nations.... Thank goodness you call New Jersey home, because I don't think it could ever recover from "The Jersey Shore" jerks without you.
Next Up: "Heartburn" and "Postcards from the Edge"
You are wonderful. I adore you. Please adopt me. Or leave the outgoing message on my cell phone.
-Caitlin
So in the past few years I think I have seen almost EVERY movie Meryl Streep has been in. Evening...Rendition... Devil Wears Prada... Doubt...It's Complicated... not to mention the delicious Julie & Julia... And she is JUST fabulous. And while watching the Today Show a few weeks ago... I heard that with this year's Golden Globes nominations, she will have been nominated 25 times. 25! Holy wow.
Well, my sister and I decided that since we have seen all of her recent work, we should start working our way through her film catalog. So last Saturday marked the first meeting of our mini Meryl Streep fan club, our viewing included "The Deer Hunter" and "Kramer vs. Kramer."
The AFI lists "The Deer Hunter" as one of the top 100 films. With all due respect to Mrs. Streep, I think it could have been skipped. 3 hours and 4 minutes of utter misery in the lives of three friends, without even a remotely positive ending. But maybe we expected our leading lady to play a larger role and since she didn't, that added to the disappointment.
"Kramer vs. Kramer" however... wonderfully emotional and even though the emphasis falls on Dustin Hoffman's character, I think it was a wonderful addition to Meryl Streep repertoire
Since our first meeting fizzled, for the next movie we decided we needed a bigger fix, so we aimed for one of her better known films.... "Out of Africa...." Robert Redford, delicious.... photography...brilliantly beautiful... Meryl... oh Meryl I love you American, I love you Danish... your larynx is a veritable United Nations.... Thank goodness you call New Jersey home, because I don't think it could ever recover from "The Jersey Shore" jerks without you.
Next Up: "Heartburn" and "Postcards from the Edge"
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